Free the bush…

… or as my future feminist movement will be called, Free the Foof!

So I went to a very lovely wedding a few weeks ago, I had my outfit all sorted, in fact I’ve worn it to every wedding I’ve been to this year, it’s my 2013 wedding outfit. Nice dress, a hat (I was hoping would look a little ‘vintage 50s’ but that I fear ended up looking rather more ‘modest 80s’), red shoes, the whole kit and caboodle. And as I was readying myself for the big event, scrubbing myself shiny in the shower I realised that I had forgotten to pack my razor. “Ah well” I thought, “It doesn’t matter, this is the north, I’ll wear tights.” Then as I continued to cleanse myself of all dirt I noticed (with some alarm) that actually my armpit hair had grown to such a length that it could have been mistaken for small kitten. At that point it looked like I should have been using shampoo and conditioner not shower gel to clean that particular area of my body.

In my last blog I did mention that I have an aversion to shaving, in fact it’s not so much an aversion as a complete lack of caring. Now, how one looks after their bodily hair has often been related to one’s political, or more specifically feminist values, I know this because I religiously listen to Woman’s Hour on Radio 4 and they say so. Can you be a feminist (or at least a good one) if you dye your hair? Can you be a feminist if you shave your armpits, legs, face or… other places?

In my case I’ve never been good at hair maintenance of any kind, I’m too impatient (and get up too late) to dry my hair, I only ever need to buy razors on leap years and I very much take the ‘Secret Garden’ approach to my, ehem, feminine upkeep. However, this has actually worsened in recent years, partly because I accidentally shaved a two and a half inch strip of flesh off my ankle during my first year at uni (by the way, running into your new house mates’ room, soaking wet covered in only a hand towel and a lot of blood, is an excellent ice-breaker) but partly because I am loved by a wonderful man who couldn’t care less whether I am hairless or otherwise. I feel attractive and sexy and loved and wanted with all my hair perfectly intact, and in abundance (as is my genes and colouring dictates). Which poses the question, am I feminist if I don’t shave my hairs because of the love of a man?

Well why does anyone else shave their body bits? To appear more attractive to their chosen sex? Because it makes them feel good about themselves? Hygiene reasons? Pressure from the spewing of modern media pressuring all women to look fictional? I’m pretty sure which one I think it is. Don’t get me wrong, I love the feeling of a silky smooth leg. I like it so much that I tend to rub my legs together after shaving which results in me adopting a very odd walk for the rest of the day, but that only ever happens around once every quarter.

But when confronted with the little kitten under my arm I too caved. I searched high and low for a razor and rid myself of all armpit hair (or as much as was possible from the weird angle one is forced to adopt when armpit shaving). I didn’t want people to think that I was dirty, because such is the pressure on women to look how society says they should look, that I would have been perceived as not quite clean if the hair that naturally grows on me and every other woman in the world had remained intact. It is now more surprising to see the natural state than the un-natural one.

Take for example, Victoria Secret models, who have recently been gracing every shiny-sheeted publication in Christendom; why has nobody ever said when looking upon their almost alien forms “wow, that look’s weird”? Because to my mind these women are freaks! Beautiful freaks! Nobody actually looks that way, but women look at these abnormally lovely creatures and think “oh, that’s how women should look, I’ll try to look like that too then.” This is a minority of people who were born all odd and have a large team of highly trained and experienced professionals to help them achieve the look of being fictional, so why are the majority of women trying to achieve it all by themselves?

My sister made the very valid point that to be a feminist is to have complete control over oneself and ones body and if that means shaving simply because you like to shave then great and I agree, but for all the women who look upon every single other women used for the advertising of anything and everything ever, ever, ever and think, “bodily hair is obviously highly unattractive” and then spend every shower time they have running sharp objects all over their skin, then I say NO! Stop razoring yourselves! It took feeling finally comfortable with my natural form to figure this out, which was, admittedly helped a lot by the love of a good person. But I was not helped into my state of happy furriness by the approval of a man, just a good person, who waded through all the ridiculous aesthetics of being a women and said “sod em, you look gorgeous.”

Everybody’s different, I am the kind of woman who got excited the other day because I realised that my pants where big enough for me to tuck both my vest and shirt into, which helps a lot with the annoying tucky-inny bit that comes with wearing high-waisted trousers. But just in case you’re the kind of woman getting out of bed 15 minutes early every day in order to shave your legs, I wanted to be person to say to you “sod em, you look gorgeous. Put that razor down and go and have a big bowl of porridge instead. It’s winter after all and you’ll need all the insulation you can get… plus porridge is a warming bowl of slow releasing energy and a much better way to start the day than hair removal.”

I’m not infallible to the pressures of beauty, I still shave or trim too, but I think what I’ve spent 1,110 words trying to say is, don’t worry so much, being hairless isn’t a compulsory requirement to being sexy, so don’t worry about it so much.

2 thoughts on “Free the bush…

  1. Totally agree with you Milly. I have the longest haired forearms of any women and never shaved them, I also never shaved my (admittedly, blond) rather hairy legs until 2 years ago and that was my choice. No one ever said that they didn’t want to be my friend cos I was too hairy! We have to give girls the power to say NO and realise that they are not freaks for wanting to be natural. Keep up the good word! Love Trish

  2. I wax now…. I am far more often hairy than not hairy. In fact I reckon monst women are actually like us post 20 years old. After they’ve confirmation that actually men find pretty much any woman attractive and would kick virtually no one out of bed…. Sorry guys, I’m not meaning to be rude but I consider myself a man expert and I’ve learnt to live with your simplicity. It’s lovely in fact. Boys don’t care a jott for smooth bodies… I bet 90% of men over 25 couldn’t tell you how hairy their last female lover was…. This begs the question ‘where does the pressure for smoothness come from?’ Not men, and not children…which leaves??
    Women are the worst and fiercest perpetrators of peer pressure regarding looks. Fact! But I really do think that most of us ignore them after a certain age. You can spot those who don’t without any problems because they are miserable and usually single.

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