First of all I have to issue a severe WARNING of selfies. Normally I get Chris to take pictures of me in all my finery but he was away for like 3 weeks which forced me to do the unthinkable – stand in front of a mirror and take a picture of it, which I have thus far avoided because it makes me feel like a complete tool. I do this only in the name of humorous blogging so dear readers – please do not judge me too harshly.
So an unexpected side effect of mental illness has been the effect it has had on my dress sense. A mixture of chronic indecision, tiredness, chemical imbalances and a certain feeling of “I actually really don’t give a shit” has led me to realise on one or two occasions that I’m dressed a little strangely. However, once I have the outfit on I can never be bothered to go through the effort of changing it, so I thought in the spirit of my current share offensive I would document these occasions for your reading pleasure.
Now I’m not altogether sure what’s going on here. I look like a confused but thoroughly modern art teacher. What’s with the stripy socks? The only redeeming thing about this outfit is that I wore it to a therapy session, which proves that I am at least I’m still dressing for the occasion.
And then came this:
To which all I can really say is WTF? If you’re wondering why my legs are such a questionable colour – it’s because I’m wearing beige woollen patterned tights. I don’t even know how I came to own such tights!? They make me look like a biscuit coloured dead person. And I got that cardigan in the sale in Tescos, now up until recently I haven’t been able to go to Tesco without having a minor panic attack – which clearly explains how I ended up acquiring this particular item of clothing.
And now for the Pierce de Resistance!
I think what really makes this outfit is the accessory:
Even Gustav is looking at me like “what on earth are you wearing?” The best thing about this outfit is that I’m wearing it now! I just put this picture on Facebook and my mum rang me and said “you’re going to have to change that outfit if you want me to come to town with you today!” But it’s really really comfortable. And besides it’s on now. And besides besides I have no idea what else I could wear today (the afore mentioned chronic indecision). And besides besides besides this dress is made of 100% neoprene which everyone knows is highly effective at warming one up with continuous static shocks on a cold November day such as this. So I’m afraid it’s just going to have to stay on.
Not sure I can get away with taking my accessory with me though. I’m holding him like a bouquet. A cat bouquet. Now that’s a good wedding idea…